Is it better to write what I’m feeling, even if it sounds like complaining, or write only when I have something good to say?
Is it better to write emotionally or avoid writing altogether when I’m not feeling great?
Is it better to gloss over the bad stuff or tell it like it is?
I was reading a blog recently and noticed that it had more than forty followers, even though it doesn’t seem like the author is anyone well known. I asked myself why she would have so many more readers than I would – seeing that she is also a stay at home mom/homemaker. I thought it through for a very short time, coming to the quick conclusion that she is almost always positive. She rarely complains, writes often about her love for her kids and her husband and when she does talk about the rough parts of motherhood, she does so with humour or with requests for prayer.
I would like to be more like her. I don’t know if she writes this way intentionally, trying to be positive even if she might not feel like being positive, or if she is truly this positive all the time. If she does it intentionally even when she feels like complaining, I understand her and envy her for her ability to avoid negativity. I wish I could do the same. I suppose with practice I could.
There are three camps of people I communicate with regularly; the people who don’t have kids and don’t really care when I talk about the negative things, the people with kids who understand why I do it and commiserate with me, and the people who want kids and can’t have them and for whom complaining mothers are heartbreaking and impossible to understand. I don’t want to offend people, so when I share things on Facebook I try to avoid being too negative.
But here I feel freedom to say what I want to say. What is more important to me? Saying what I feel: that life is hard, that I’m depressed (there, I said it), that my kids sometimes just don’t listen to me and it drives me crazy, that my husband works too much and if I could, I would never leave the house? Or is attracting readers and making them feel good more important?
This is a hard question for me to answer. When I read other blogs that are filled with negative thinking and complaining, it bugs me. I don’t feel like going on reading them when there is hardly ever anything positive shared in them. I don’t want to make other people feel that way.
The question is still not answered. I’m not sure that it ever will be.